stuff is cool

Exactly 9 days ago, I was prescribed Zyrtec to relieve the itching of my mystery rash (probably psoriasis). The prescription cost me a whopping 71 dollars for 30 pills. Today I drag my pained, leprosy-looking body to explore the CVS across the street, as I do almost every day, desperate to find some sort of cream to relive my itching. Horrifically, there, in a glorious “FU” display: “PRESCRIPTION STRENGTH ZYRTEC, NOW OTC!” 30 pills cost fucking $18.99.

CAN I CATCH A DAMN BREAK? Like I have money to throw around with a wedding three weeks away. On top of that, on MONDAY I ordered some turmeric supplements because I have read numerous accounts of miraculous healing for psoriasis sufferes. I made sure to get *next day delivery* so I could get it in my system asap. It’s now FRIDAY. No delivery. Next day delivery MY ASS. I want to explode.

So, for the third day in a row, I have a good violent cry and scream at God. I hear about people who lose their ability to walk or get terminal cancer in every single organ, and people admire them saying: “She’s sooo brave, never once did she ask God why she was suffering.”

Well, I am no angel. I ask why. WHY. Why am I crippled one day, just achy the next (and achy is no picnic.) Why do I cry out in my sleep every time I toss and turn because it hurts my bones. Why am I tormented by anxiety and depression. Why am I COVERED in disgusting itchy welts of bright red terror, all the way from the bottom of my feet to my very scalp? I limp because the bottom of one foot is really painful.

My “most special day” is rapidly approaching and I am falling apart. And about to have a epic nervous breakdown.

Zyrtec, you are the last straw.

My recent obsession has been collecting Yankee Candles. I recently discovered a treasure trove of rare and discontinued scents on Ebay, but cannot afford to indulge as I would like. Some are selling for upwards of 80 dollars!

My current rotation goes between store-bought Mediterranean Cypress, Vanilla Cupcake, and Fresh Cut Roses (that scent will be present at my wedding by strategically placed candles to enhance the fragrance of the real roses on display.) I frequent the store so much I probably should consider working there.

I think I am very much calmed by soothing fragrance, and it is one of the “tools” my therapist encourages me to enjoy when I need to calm down and be at peace.

When spring officially comes I look forward to Yankee Candle Greenhouse scent and Island Spa. Both would make lovely, inexpensive wedding gifts, incidentally.

But that’s neither here nor there.

My NEW hobby ties into my love of history. I should like to collect prints of the portraits of my favorite historical figures. Due to being an Anglophile, they are all Lords and Ladies, Dukes, Duchesses, Kings and Queens.

I was so thrilled and lucky to come across an immediately recognizable antique print of an unidentified “Baby Stuart” on a trip to Belleville, TX at Christmas time.

A very old rendering identified at Henriette Anne that is basically the exact image I posses, only mine is, of course, a print dating only to the 19th century:

Who would have guessed I’d find such a treasure in a small Texas town? My beloved Danny bought it for me, to go along with my beautiful portrait of Mary, Princess Royal, sister to the great Charles II.

She looks so sweet at the tender age of preadolescence. My mother presented me with that portrait after she returned from her trip to England. To see the real painting in person would be a dream come true, but really, to see where they lived and died would be sublime.

I love the portraits because I admire the people.

The baby’s identity is vague. Some say she is Henriette Anne of England, daughter of Charles I and sister to Charles II, raised in the French court and married to the Duc D’Orleans, the cruel brother of the Sun King. I have a special place in my heart for her, if that is indeed the child in the portrait.

My research suggests that the child is in fact just a young Mary, Princess Royal. EDIT: No, I am now convinced the portrait of the infant actually depicts James, Duke of York, later James II of England. Either way, I greatly admire the entire House of Stuart.

My point? There are other ladies and gentlemen I wish to add to my eventual portrait gallery, starting with the rags to riches Emma, Lady Hamilton, the great love of Lord Nelson.

I have long admire Nelly Gwynne, one of many mistresses to Charles II, but hands down the most charming and down-to-earth and beloved by the people. However the only portraits i could find online of her had in in a state of undress, and since this is a family blog, I refrained from sharing them here.

Yes, I have plans to seek out prints of portraits of all these illustrious royals and courtiers. They are my “celebrity obsessions.” No Britney or the Olsens or whathave you. Historical figures who lived scandalous, merry lives full of intrigue who managed to outwit so many plotting against them. They are my inspirations.

I love history, for it is peopled with incredible people, flawed nonetheless, who weathered their stormy lives with dignity not seen in decades. For some reason British history draws me most. I owe that passion to author Karleen Koen, who I am excitedly looking forward to acceptingly her invitation for coffee and chatting history, once the wedding wildness has died down.

But a half hour ago I was tormented by my ever-present, seemingly worsening rash, and I was lost in tears. I focused on what I love: history, and it got me out of the terrible feeling.

Well, lots has gone on since my last post, and some of you have begged for an update. Now that the holidays are over and the drudgery of work resumes, I know we all need distractions from work more than ever!

1) Remicade

My back pain is still a major problem. My spine appears to be fully inflamed, from my neck all the way down. Sleeping is still difficult, as is moving around in general. The good news is that I have had two full doses of the new drug remicade that is supposed to strop the progession of damage and increase my mobility while alleviating the pain. Doses are gived in IV drip that takes a few hours. Danny takes off work to be with me, which makes him even more a hero to me than he already was.

I am starting to see improvement, and hope to keep getting better so that by the time the wedding arrives, I will at least be able to boogie.

2) Christmas

Another wonderful Christmas, though it seems we have had to abandon most of my childhood traditions for new ones. It takes some getting used to.

3) SLUMBER PARTY!

I was feeling ambitious and invited my 3 cousins over for a slumber party a few nights ago. We baked red velvet cupcakes with homemade cream cheese filling (the way it baked itslef into the center was amazing). Then we pampered ourselves with mud masks, even Sammy. We played High School Musical Mystery Date, and Sammy was the winner with a date with none other than Troy himself. I must include some pics here, as it was so much fun:

The children practice being beauticians:

We look mahvelous.

Christopher gets attacked by ZOMBIES!

Mystery date was frustratingly difficult to assemble, but worth it.

I felt like Supermom as I got each child showered and ready for bed, and was able to convince them to split just one cupcake for their bedtime snack. They all climbed into my bed to fall asleep, and then I led their sleepwalking little bodies into the guest room. I think pretty soon they’ll be too grown up for all 3 to fit in the guest bed!

4) Happy 2008!

We rang in the New Year with the Frosts. Much alcohol was consumed. Mostly by Danny. YIKES!

5) Biggio Escapes

My cousin Sammy got a new puppy yesterday. he is a stray who appears to be a long-haired terrier of some type, but he’s so skinny from being on the streets that we can’t tell what he’ll really look like yet. His name is Biggio and he’s estimated to be a little over a year old, I think.

Well, little Biggio likes to bolt out the door any chance he gets, and he got that chance yesterday when little Christopher left the door open when he went out to the car for some baseball gloves. That dog TORE out of the house and down the street with my entire family in pursuit. Somehow I gained superhero abilities, because I was so worried for that puppy’s safety that I ran top-speed after him, pain shotting though my back every time my feet hit the pavement. My aunt Michelle and I cornered him, and the others arrived and fanned out in a tactical position. Biggio made a break for it and I did something I somewhat regret.

I tackled him to the ground. I literally laid out on some stranger’s driveway, shoving the poor puppy into a car tire and then basically landing on him. It hurt my back so bad I screamed, which scared the poor dog even more. I was still holding onto him and calculating whether or not I would ever be able to walk again when the rest of the family surrounded me, recovered the dog, and got me off the ground. I took pain meds when I got home and sat on a chair with my back against a bag of shoes, which happens to be very therapeutic, amazingly enough.

From now on New Years Day 2008 will be known as the day Noonie tackled Biggio. I could barely walk after that, and last night was pretty miserable, but I’ll be damned if I ever let anything bad happen to a puppy.

I also chuckle as I think about how we ran around the neighborhood screaming “Biggio, come back! Biggio, STOP!” Neighbors might have thought Craig Biggio himself was running for his life from lunatic fans.

6) Rash in the New Year

And now I am here in bed, back sore, a bit feverish, and covered in that same damn rash that got me a few weeks ago. I didn’t think the rash is associated with the chase after Biggio, because it started to appear before that. But when I had this rash before, we thought it was an allergic reaction to Percoet. I went off it, the rash went away, and so did the flu-like symptoms. But now the rash is back, and it can;t be blamed on Percocet. So I go to the doctor tomorrow to get to the bottom of it.

Which brings me back to #1: It may be a side effect of Remicade. Grrrreat.

Anyway, here’s to 2008, the year I become Mrs. Daniel DiPaolo!